TubaForum.net

After spending a considerable amount of time cogitating on method, materials, design, etc., I came up with this do-it-yourself product: The customization possibilities are endless! Different bin colors are available at your local Walmart Emporium. Coordinating/contrasting colors of pool noodles can add a festive flair. Red and green for Tuba Christmas, black and orange for Octoberfest, and tuba majors burning through mortgage-sized student loan money while wondering if they can possibly get a job that justifies a graduate-level performance degree can make one in their school colors! That would certainly help.

And no, the idea did not come to me while contemplating throwing my tuba away. I was actually watching a Youtube video about making a tuba stand out of lumber(!) and the trashcan image just flashed in my head.

Being constructed of mostly petroleum products, it will do nothing other than increase in value.

EDIT: Perhaps (??) you should start producing them, and your brand name could be Wiseguy™...

...Of course, it would need to feature wheels and straps, and you should try to keep the price below £3000.